Amakuba y’umwigeme yatanzwe na murumunawe kuja kwubaka urwiwe

Uruvugo, gutungwa intoke, n’ibindi bidahimbaye, ni vyo bishikira umukobwa atarubaka urwiwe, mu gihe umwe canke benshi muri barumunawe bamutanze kwubaka izabo. Kuki iyo umuhungu mukuru atanzwe na mutoya wiwe kwubaka bifatwa nk’ibisanzwe, ariko bibaye ku mukobwa umengo ni agahabwa ?

Chantal* ni inkumi y’imyaka 32. Avukana n’abakobwa babiri. Anitha* amukurikira afise imyaka 29 akaba amaze imyaka 2 yubatse. Solange* amukurikira ubwa kabiri na we azogira ubugeni mu mezi atatu ari imbere. Aratwiganira ingene  bitamworoheye na gato, akagira ati : “Kera abahungu barandondera ariko sinari bwaronke uwo nokwemerera ngo twubakane. Mutoya wanje amaze kuncako ntibagarutse. Ubu hoho rero n’uwundi agira agende.”

Fabiola* wewe yagize izindi ngorane nk’uko abitwiganira : “Haciye imyaka 2 nshimanye n’umuhungu turanasezerana ko tuzokwubakana. Ariko nabikojeje abavyeyi banyamirira kure ngo hamwe notanga mukurwanje kwubaka ryoba ari ivumwe. Naragomvye guhatirako ariko bambwiye ko baca banca mu muryango. Kubera gutinya kurenga ku ryo abavyeyi bavuze, naciye ndabiheba. Ubu nsa n’uwufatiwe amaboko  i mugongo.”

Amananiza

Gutamba imbere y’isinzi ry’abantu mu mwambaro udasanzwe, ni co gihano cahabwa uwutanzwe na murumunawe kwubaka urwiwe aho hambere mu bice bimwebimwe vy’igihugu ca Canada. Aha iwacu hoho, naho ata gihano kizwi bamuha, uwo bishikiye aboneka nk’uwanduye iceyi, na canecane iyo ari umukobwa. 

Ariko aho bigoreye, ni uko muri ukwo gushaka gukurikiza uko bikurikirana, imiryango isanga ihohoteye umwe muri izo nkurikirane. Ashobora kuba ari uwo mutoya babujije kwiterera intambwe yabishaka nk’uko wa Fabiola, canke akaba  mukuru aciye abita mu rudubi agasubira kwicuza mu nyuma.

Ivyari i magera…

Chantal na Fabiola bagize ingorane zitandukanye, ariko bose bazize ivyiyumviro vy’abantu bitakijanye n’igihe. Mu kinjana tugezemwo, nta muvyeyi yari akwiye kubera intambamyi umwana wiwe ashaka kwubaka ngo ni kubera mukuruwe atarubaka kuko nta n’ikiba cemeza ko azubaka. Nta musore yari akwiye kwirengagiza umukobwa yashimye ngo ni kubera ko murumunawe yamuciyeko, kuko ntibisigura ko ari umubegito. Ashobora kuba atari bwaronke uwo yiyumvamwo akanka kujana nyabahururu.

Umukobwa na we abonye murumunawe amutanze kwubaka, ntiyari akwiye kumugirira ishari kuko umwe wese afise amahirwe yiwe, agahitamwo uwo ashimye. Kwambara impeta ku rutoke si vyo bituma umwigeme aba umuntu nk’uko bivugwa n’umuhinga mu vy’inyifato Caroline Bernard.  Avuga kandi ko “ata kamaro ko kwigereranya n’uwundi kuko umwe wese afise inzira yiwe.” Ikindi kandi, kuba umuntu atarubaka urwiwe, ntibimutesha iteka kuko ashobora n’ukugira akamaro kenshi kurusha uwubatse.

*: bahinduwe amazina