Kuganira ibijanye n’indwara zifatira mu bihimba vy’irondoka ni ikintu gikomeye cane ku bafashe ingingo yo gukundana. Iyo hari uwumva hari akatameze neza mu magara yiwe, ni vyiza ko abibwira umukunzi wiwe. Muti vyogenda gute ?
Nimba mukundana canke muza mwarubakanye, kuvugana ivyerekeye kwikingira mu gihe c’imibonano ni ikintu ca nkenerwa cane. Igihe naho woba ufise indwara yandukira iciye mu bihimba vy’irondoka, biganire n’uwo umutima wawe wakunze na we akagukundira. Birakomeza kwizigiranira hagati yanyu.
Ariko rero kirazira kwijajara kuko uwo mukundana arashobora kuba amaze kugira imibonano mpuzabitsina naho wewe woba utarabikora, ntusye bwose. Mu gihe rero yabigize adakoresheje agakingirizo, vyoshika akaba agendana indwara imwe mu zifatira mu bihimba vy’irondoka harimwo umugera wa Sida.
Bisaba kwugurukiranira
Mu kubiganira, umwe wese ayagira uwundi mu buryo butuma bugurukirakiranira. Muriko muganira ibijanye n’amabanga y’abubatse. Arashobora kuvuga nk’uku : “Birampimbara ukuntu tuvugana ibijanye n’ubuzima ndorabitsina. Nama niyumvira ibijanye n’agakingirizo canke uburyo bubuza gusama utabishatse”.
Aho rero urashobora kubona ingene avyakiriye, mugaca mutangura kuza muravugana ibijanye n’ukwikingira gusama mutabiteguye.
Hari uburyo bwinshi bwo kubimwereka, mugabo uwo mukundanye araheza akabona iryo ugona biciye mu vyo uvuga. Azoheza abone ko kutikingira ari ukwigerezako.
Tora igihe ciza
Vyose bisaba umwanya ubereye. Kirazira kubiganirira mu buriri. Ivyo mubivugane mu kiganiro gisanzwe, mugabo muri mwenyene, kandi mu gihe ciza mwese muganonokewe. Ca umubaza rero ko adafise indwara yandukira biciye mu bihimba vy’irondoka canke ko azizi neza. Umwugurukire kandi ugeregeze kumutuma yisanzura ntaguhishe na kimwe.
Mu kubivuga, ntushike ududurirako. Ibaze nawe uciye waduka ngo : “Ndafise ibintu biteye ubwoba nshaka kukubwira!”
Umukunzi wawe yoca atunguka umutima ata na kimwe uravuga. Nk’akarorero wovuga uti : “Hari ikintu gihambaye ntegerezwa kukubwira. Nasanze mfise indwara iyi (vuga izina ry’iyo ndwara ifatira mu bihimba vy’irondoka)”. Nimba uriko urafata imiti yayo, mubwire na we nyene ayifate, kandi ubimusigurire.
Ongereza ubumenyi
Imbere yo kubibwira umukunzi wawe, gerageza umenye vyinshi bishoboka ku bijanye n’indwara zifatira mu bihimba vy’irondoka, kugira ushobore kwishura ibibazo vyose ubazwa. Ivyo bizomwereka ko uvyitwararitse cane kandi ko urazwa ishinga n’ukumererwa neza kwiwe.
Ikindi kintu muvugana ni ibijanye no kudahemukiranira. Birashobora gushika ugasanga urafise iyo ndwara kandi ata wundi muntu n’umwe mwaryamanye mu buzima bwawe, kiretse uwo wawe gusa. Ico womenya ni uko iyo ndwara ishobora kwihisha mu mubiri igihe kinini cane ata kimenyesto na kimwe cigaragaje. Ntuce wibaza ko umukunzi yaguciyemwo. Mubaze ko hari indwara zifatira mu bihimba vy’irondoka aripimisha, urabe uko akwishura.
Mu gihe ashavuye…
Umukunzi wawe ashobora kwakira nabi ivyo umubariye. Bigenze uko, ntuhirahire ngo uje mu vyo kumwishura nk’uwivuna, canke ngo utwarwe n’ishavu nawe. Muhe nyabuna akanya ko kuzirikana ivyo wamubariye. Ivyo bizoshobora gufata umwanya, kandi ntiwitege ko riba ari ryo rya nyuma hagize akatagenda neza hagati yanyu, kandi nk’abakundana muzobirengera. Erega “nta zibana zidakomanya amahembe”.
PS: Mushobora kuvyisomera aho twabikuye kuri runo rubuga.