Urugo ruragoye kubungabunga. Igitondo umugoroba, twama twumva abo vyananiye bagahereza kwahukana. Ivyo bikaba bituruka ku mvo zitandukanye. Mu gitabo ciwe yise “Couple : clés pour le réussir (Abubakanye : ibintu bituma urugo rurama Ndlr)”, umuhinga Jacob Azeroual asanzwe ari umuganga yanonosoye ivy’ingo n’imiryango aratuyagira intambamyi zibangamira umubano mwiza hagati y’abubakanye. Turabire hamwe zimwe muri zo.
Kwibaza ko ikintu cose gishobora gusubirizwa
Mu rugendo rwo gushaka umunezero mu buzima bwabo, gushaka kumerewa neza, abantu benshi baragize ingeso yo kwibaza ko ikintu uko kimeze kwose gishobora gusubirizwa.
Umuntu arahindura umuduga uko ashatse, inzu, abagenzi, iyo bishitse ntabe agihuza na bo, kugeza aho yibaza ko ashobora no guhindura uwo babana. Jacob Azeroual avuga ko abantu ubu usanga bakoresha ibintu atari uko babikeneye, yamara babikenera kugira bapfe kubikoreshe gusa. Avuga kandi ko muri bino bihe, iyo abantu bakundanye bahuye n’ibibazo, bihutira gusambura aho kubanza kurondera umuhuza, canke umuhinga mu gufasha abubatse ari we bita mu Gifaransa “conseiller conjugal”. Ntibafata akanya ko guhanuza ababegereye, kurondera gusubiza hamwe. Nyabuna bihutira gufata inzira y’amatati aho kurondera kwiyunga ubwa mbere.
Kwikwegerako
Muri ico gitabo, uwo mwanditsi avuga ko kiremwa muntu w’ubu yiraba imbere ya vyose, arondera ukumererwa neza ukwiwe wenyene ; uwo bubakanye akamwibagira, akamuha ikibanza gito, canke n’ico gito akakimwima. Avuga ko umuntu wo muri kino kinjana bimugora cane kwigorera uwundi. Amubona nk’uko umenga ni igikoresho kigenewe gukora ikintu kanaka, kandi gifise ikiringo ntarengwa kizomara. Yitayeho cane ingorane ziwe bwite, akabona ko abandi i ruhande yiwe bafise utugorane tubayabaye cane kurusha iziwe zama zihanitse.
Ugushaka kwikwegerako hamwe no kudakorera urugo rwiwe bisigaye vyarabaye akamenyero. Abagabo, co kimwe n’abagore barahunga amabanga bajejwe mu ngo, ari na vyo bivamwo ukwahukana canke bigatuma urugo rutakaza ubumwe n’urukundo.
Ukutavugana : “tubanye tutabanye”
Tubaye mu gihushane gitangaje. Uno musi hari uburyo bwinshi bwo kuyaga (ngendanwa, imbuga koraniro nka Whatsapp, Facebook, ubuhinga butandukanye ku ngurukanabumenyi,…), yamara ukutavugana ni co kiranga imiryango myinshi.
Uno mwanditsi avuga ko, mu kazi kiwe, ahimiriza abantu kwandikiranira ubutumwa bugufi bahana mwaramutse canke babwirana utujambo turyoshe. Yamara, kirazira ko abakundanye bakoresha ubutumwa bugufi mu kwisigura mu bikomeye vyo mu rukundo rwabo. Ubutumwa bugufi bukwega ingorane zo kwumva ibitari vyo, kuko nya butumwa butagaragaza ibishobisho nk’uko abantu boba bari kumwe, naho bufise udushusho bita “émoticônes” mu Gifaransa, abantu bakoresha tugerageza kwerekana ivyo bishobosho, ivyo gusa ntibikwiye.
Mu vyerekeye ubuhinga bwa none, avuga ko ubu abantu baha akanya abari kure gusumba abo baba bari kumwe hafi. Ni kenshi usanga abantu bicaranye, yamara ugasanga umwe wese yatwawe na ngendanwa yiwe. Umuntu yoyaga n’uwo bakundana gute kandi umwe wese abari mw’isi yiwe, yibereye mu vyiwe ?
Ugucana inyuma
Abakundana bose haragera igihe bagaca mu bihuhusi. Ku kazi, mu buryo bwo kwiyunguruza, ngendanwa, ingurukanabumenyi … biri mu bituma abantu bahura bagashimana. Kuvugana n’uwundi ku mbuga ngurukanabumenyi bishobora gukwega guca inyuma uwo mukundana.
Muri ico gihe kitoroshe, bashobora kugwa kandi ababaragije ijisho muri ivyo bihe bitoroshe bagashobora kubatsitaza. Nk’uko uyu mwanditsi abivuga, kugira umuntu yirinde kugwa mu ngorane, iyo habaye ikibazo hagati y’abakundana, yokwihutira kugitorera umuti, canke akazitira ataronerwa. Muri ico gihe, uko kurondera gusubiza hamwe canke kubwirana amajambo aryoshe bibwirizwa kunyaruka.
Kwitondera ibi bintu no kuvyirinda vyotuma imiryango iba mu mahoro, abubakanye bumvikana kandi bubahirizanya, ingo zikarama.
Turabaramukije,
Mwoshobora kudutiza iminota itarenze ibiri, mukishura kuri utu tubazo twerekeye ivy’imfashanyo mw’iterambere zihabwa Uburundi ? Ivyo mutwishura bizokingirwa, kandi bihejeje gukoreshwa bizoca bifutwa.
https://www.yaga-burundi.com/questionnaire-rapport-aide-developpement/
Vraiment Muratunezera Can Kubwizo Mpanur Muduha . Guma Muhezagirwa