Kwubakana n’umukenyezi asanzwe afise umwana: ico kumenya

Abantu benshi ntibatahura ukuntu umusore arongora umukobwa yibarukiye iwabo. Nta kintu na kimwe bafatirako, atari uko mu muryango w’umuhungu baba bashaka ko yubakana n’umukobwa atagira umwana nka we. Mugabo ubiravye, usanga harimwo kwihenda mu gucira urubanza umuntu kuko yibarukiye iwabo canke yahukanye. Mu bisanzwe, abo bantu barakunda, bakubaka neza urugo ; ariko hari vyinshi abo bubakanye bategerezwa kumenya. Tubirabire hamwe twifashishije umwihwezo uri ku rubuga rw’ikinyamakuru Gnadoe.

Abakobwa bamaze kwibaruka, kenshi usanga hari abantu bababonamwo akantu keza abandi bakobwa badafise (mu bihugu bimwebimwe Ndlr). Coba ari co gituma hari abahungu baca babakunda kurusha kuko ngo baba baramaze guturura, bakaba mbere bazi ibintu n’ibindi kurusha. Mugabo, ibigwiriye ni uko uwo mukobwa adahuta arakundwa, na canecane ko yavyaranye n’uwundi mugabo. Abantu rero usanga baguma bibaza ngo none vyoba ari bibi imisi yose kwubakana n’umukobwa afise umwana umwe canke abarenga. Ng’ibi ibikunda gushika.

Uwamuvyayeko amwama hafi

Ikitihanganirwa mu rukundo bene urwo, ni mu gihe ubona kenshi umwe yamuvyarako aza kumuraba. Uwo wa kera aba afise urwitwazo rwo kuza kuraba umwana. Mugabo kenshi urashobora gusanga harimwo akantu ko gusuma urusaku, yitwaza ngo aje kuraba umwana wiwe. Iyo ari uwahukanye hoho, birashobora gushika ugasanga uwo mugabo wa kera ariko aragira amayeri yose kugira ngo asubire kwigarurira uwo bigeranye.

Muri ico gihe, wa mugabo mushasha araheza akisanga ari mu rukundo rurimwo abantu batatu : se-umwana-nyina. Kumbure aribaza ikibanza abifisemwo akabura.

Uruhara rw’abana

Abana bose bama bipfuza kubona abavyeyi babo bari kumwe. Bigatuma batakira kubona uwundi mugabo mu kibanza ca se. Ni co gituma hari aho usanga umwana atubaha umugabo wa nyina. Uwo mugabo rero araheza akagorwa n’ukumuha indero. Hari mbere abana bagerageza ibishoboka vyose kugira ngo basambure uwo mubano wa ba nyina n’abo bubakanye gushasha, kugira se na nyina basubirane.

Ukwitanga kw’umugabo

Umugabo arashobora kuba atari umugwaneza, ugasanga uwo mwana (canke abana) umugore yaje azanye, be n’abo yavyaye ntababafata kumwe. Ivyo birakunda gushika rero iyo uwo mugabo na we asanganywe abandi bana. 

Ivyo vyose mugabo bivana n’ishaka n’urukundo rutikunda. Ntushobora kuvuga ngo urakunda umugore wawe udakunda abana biwe. Nyabuna wategerezwa kwitwara nka se w’abo bana koko.  Uko uzobereka urukundo rudahemana, niko bazogukunda, kumbure banagufate nka se yavyaye.

Abahuje ibibazo bahuza n’imitima

Iyo umuhungu n’umukobwa (canke umugabo n’umugore) bompi bafise abana, nta ntambamyi n’imwe bagira mu miryango iwabo. Emwe twavuga ko ari nk’urukino usanga ruheze bose banganya. Ikiba kiryoshe mu bantu bene abo ni uko, iyo basanzwe bari barahukanye n’abandi, umwe wese aba amaze kubona ivy’urugo uko bigenda. Kubera rero baba barabonye aho vyankira, baba bazi uko bifata, umwe agahebera uwundi mu bijanye n’inyifato. Baritangira urugo kurusha uko bahora mu ruba rwarasambutse.

Abapfasoni babushitse

Umukenyezi yamaze kwibaruka, aba afise uburambe mu bintu bitari bike bisosa n’ibirura. Aba azi vy’ukuri ico akeneye ku mugabo, na canecane ko ataba ashaka gusubira kubona ayo yaboneye ku wo bakundanye ubwa mbere. Wabiriye umugore nk’uyo, birafise akarusho kubera ko aba azi kwihangana, kubera yamaze kuba umuvyeyi, kugenza bugufi bikaba bifasha mu gutorera umuti ingorane zaduka mu ngo. 

Kira noneho, aba ari umupfasoni nk’abandi, uretse ko aba yarashikiwe no kuba yarahukanye canke yibarutse akiri inkumi. Nimba vy’ukuri umukunda, kuba amaze kwibaruka nticobabera intambamyi. Ikirengeye vyose, ni uko urukundo rwemera vyose, rurinda vyose, rukagira imbabazi muri vyose.